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JP's Last Days
Dear Friends, I imagine by now you have heard of Jeannine's passing. I am slowly working on another longer piece called, "Apprentice to the Goddess Parvati," but for now I just want to convey a bit about being with Jeannine (JP) these last few months. Quinn and Halley are amazingly devoted children. It has been around two years since JP noticed she was ill and learned about the Hep-C. They have been helping her consistently since then to make the transition from full speed ahead, double Gemini, Moon in Leo, to low energy, to not able to walk easily, to bed ridden, to unable to talk, till now, and all the steps in between. Being educated at home (and around the world) and somewhat sheltered, Quinn and Halley have had a crash course in responsibility. By the time it was possible for me to be more involved, JP was already in bed most of the time. It was especially difficult for her, being so self-reliant and proud, to need to ask for everything that she needed, and since she continued for a long time to keep up a full schedule of communication and management of the various aspects of her many businesses, all of Jeannine's many helpers were kept very busy all the time. Quinn and Halley were engaged all the time and fortunately, several very capable assistants volunteered. I only briefly met Sara (Bly?) from California, didn't meet Jane Bernstein from Maine, and another woman I think called Rachel who was an early caretaker. Audrey Spach from California and Robin (last name?) were here at the same time I was, as was Rachel Kellum from Colorado, and Mia Dorothea Tortilla from Cali. Clara Scropetta came all the way from Italy with her husband Yann Vai from France and their 2 children (and one on the way). They had originally come to apprentice with Jeannine but became dedicated helpers for several months. The baby that Clara was carrying while JP was declining was born in Italy the day after Jeannine died! Cindra Thompson from Washington also stayed for a good bit of time with her twins in tow. Jeannine also enjoyed the help of her dear friend, Mary Ceallaigh, who beautifully crafted the Birthkeeper site, and the newest Hygieia student, Abbi Mountain. Audrey has the distinction of returning for a second period of compassionate service in November. We heard about Babz Covington from Gloria Lemay and she came from South Carolina to be a midwife for Jeannine's last days, and was an angel sent as an answer to prayers. There were visitors for shorter periods of time including Jeannine's children and grandchild, Loi and Wynn, Oceana and Cheyenne, and Gannon, and a very helpful visit by Deb Puterbaugh and Nan Koehler from California, Rosemary Gladstar from Vermont and Steve Scott from Salt Lake City. Deb is JP's first graduate of Hygieia College, and with Nan were major coordinators of the California support team, which also included Marilyn Milos, Mohini, and Mark Smith. Steve Scott helped by putting folks up at his place in Salt Lake City and transporting them back and forth from the airport. Margie and Judith helped manage the circle of support web site, and Nathan Kennard continuously updated the birthkeeper site. Many caring neighbors, like Rebecca, Diane, Jeannine's well-loved apprentice Emily, and her sister were also a great support to the family. If we include all the folks who visited, wrote letters and sent ideas, supplements, donations, food, email, etc., etc., then the list would be in the hundreds or thousands -- a tribute to Jeannine and the number of folks she has touched with her word medicine. I know that I am forgetting some folks so please forgive me and let me know, so that I can make the corrections. There were many others from the local area who helped a bunch and of course the Hospice team was very dedicated. So as you can see, JP had amazing assistance and from all over the U.S., Canada, Australia, and Europe. In fact the Hospice director said that JP only lasted as long as she did due to all the forms of help she received. Although it was very hard to watch her suffer so much, I think that the extended time served her and all of us by giving us the time to make the huge transition and say meaningful goodbyes. Jeannine and I were able to do some very good healing during this time. I actually got this double Gemini butterfly to land in one place long enough to do some serious (and playful) talking. Ha! Jeannine endured all the three kinds of suffering the Buddhists describe: all-pervading pain, such as in accidents, sickness, etc.; the pain of alternation, or the mental anguish that we add from worrying; and the pain of pain, which is another level of anguish when we judge the whole affair. It is perhaps even harder for someone like JP who is very knowledgeable about all this, because when she would be grumpy or critical or negative, she would also add the pain of embarrassment and remorse. I asked her at one point, what it was now that made it worthwhile living and she said, "making things more beautiful, love, and helping others." She was very dedicated to these values, trying to help others on the phone, mailing gifts to everyone she could think of, and create as much beauty as possible from her bedside command post. It was heartbreaking to watch a person who was so capable try to maintain her patterns of very involved communication, with the resulting frustration and sadness. At times she would ask for help with dying sooner, but the last few weeks she seemed to surrender more to the process, while alternating between wanting less pain medication so she could be more alert, to wanting more medication so she could sleep. Her body was extremely thin and in the last couple weeks, even with extra cushioning, she started to develop bed sores that added to her pain and discomfort. We got to a schedule of turning her every couple hours and this was very painful for her too. The last few days, and with the old moon in Scorpio, she became very withdrawn into herself and would only say an occasional "yes" or "no," smile or raise an eyebrow. On the morning of December first, Babz came to get me early
as JP was agitated and moving around a lot. She quieted down a bit
as I held her hand and told her that it was OK to go now. The
Hospice nurses came first thing in the morning and gave her a sponge
bath and washed her hair. Jeannine settled down some but was still
moving her eyes around as in a dream and her breath became more
irregular as if gulping her air. She tightened her jaw, a faint smile
came over her face and that was her last breath. Babz went to get Quinn
and Halley. Her Hospice counselor, John Bagley, was sitting nearby.
Although we had to overcome some local resistance to do so, Jeannine's body remained in her bedroom for another day and a half. I spoke into her ear often something like this: "Jeannine, you do not need to worry about your children, I am here, your projects will be cared for also. You have helped many, many folks have a better life and your karma is good so ride on this to the Ocean of Light. From this realm of the Clear Light you can recognize the true ephemeral nature of the phenomenal world. It is like the waves on this Ocean of Light and your true nature is the totality of this vast Ocean. You can go there now and realize your unity with this Vastness. Stay to your spiritual purpose of remaining with this Clear Light realm or being reborn in a way to continue your work of Love, Service, and Beautification. Do not be distracted by fearful or seductive images, they are empty remainders of old patterns like dream fragments. You are free. Go to the Light. There are so many who love you and are praying for your joyous passage. Recognize the stages of the grosser elements dissolving into the finer and finer stages of mind until you reach absolute Clarity. This is You, stay with this Clarity." Jeannine's body was transported to the mortuary in nearby Richfield Friday evening and stayed undisturbed there. On Saturday, when Mohini and Claudia from California arrived, we went to visit her in the mortuary, bringing more flowers and singing to her. On Sunday the body was taken to Salt Lake City and cremated. Mohini, Claudia, and I went again to pick up the ashes. We created an altar in her room and did a ceremony/meditation that evening. Since that time, Babz has left, Nan has come and gone and Gannon is here. We are adjusting to the absence of such strong life force. Even though I regularly sit by her altar or visualize her in meditation, my mind still goes to the automatic response of thinking of her physical needs since it was such an intensive care situation the last few weeks of her life. The abrupt end to that regular intensity is a deadly silent void . . .
Jeannine left a very indelible mark with her words and actions. She may have been the first to use the word "Prenatal Yoga," which is now so commonplace. Her book PRENATAL YOGA AND NATURAL BIRTH, was certainly one of the first in this era. In remote places like Tasmania, folks would tell us that they used that book in their pregnancy and passed it on to their friends and children. HYGIEIA: A WOMAN'S HERBAL, was one of the first to meld archetypal psychology, feminism, and plants as living allies. It was meant to be her Master's thesis in psychology at Sonoma State, but by accident was sent to the Biology department where it was not understood. Consequently, Jeannine never quite got her master's degree, but as was her style, just shrugged and said, "I do not need the credentials anyway, my work will stand on its own merit." She refused to pursue it further. CONSCIOUS CONCEPTION: ELEMENTAL JOURNEY THROUGH THE LABYRINTH OF SEXUALITY, her third book, was ahead of its time, but has continued to be valued by a dedicated group of a folks. Almost a cult classic, we have heard of couples carrying the book around who want to get pregnant! Conscious conception as an idea helped usher in the now popularly accepted era of prenatal consciousness and sensitivity. Twenty years ago when it was first published and the 20 years before that when it was being conceived and written, the idea of conscious conception and prenatal education was largely unheard of. Jeannine helped popularize Lotus Birth and the alternative culture version of the "Blessingway" as a form of birth preparation ritual. She would closely watch the birthing couple during the ceremony to detect early signs of patterns that might interfere with giving birth. She and I labored hard to get the idea of the "holy trinity" of mother/father/child as primary birthing unit appreciated, assisting the evolution from home birth with midwife to permitting the father's full acceptance in the delivery to eventually, after the unassisted home and underwater birth of our three children, to primarily focusing on helping other families to celebrate "freebirth." another of Jeannine's neologisms. Freebirth being ideally the conscious preparation, birthing and early childhood, retaining and maximizing the sanctity of the holy trinity without the need for experts to dilute the love bonding of this sacred and pivotal time. Following out the natural progression, Jeannine was a dedicated advocate for home education and against the childhood sexual mutilation called circumcision. Bringing it all back home, she was a tireless worker to protect the environment and promote family health. Locally she was instrumental in blocking a proposed asbestos dump site that was poorly designed, fought for years to curtail the aerial spraying of malathion for mosquitos, and from her deathbed worked to block a coal-fired power plant.
 Jeannine's "Book of the Moon Club" and "Hygieia College Correspondence Course" touched the lives of literally thousands around the world with its curriculum of "womancraft," which included herbs, midwifery, astrology, archetypal psychology and maiutic healing. (Socrates called his method of doing philosophy the maiutic method, meaning in the method of the midwife, to talk with his students, letting the questions draw out their own natural knowing). As Jeannine would say, "the wound reveals the cure." She would ask questions that often led the questioner to the deeper meaning of their own particular dis-ease. Which perhaps leads us to ask about the meaning of Jeannine's liver disease called HCV. She certainly turned her questions inward to look more closely at her own wound and cure. As for the "cause," it probably will not be know for sure, she liked to say that it was caused by a Rhogam shot, which is possible, but she also liked to say, in true Gemini/Leo fashion, that she, "never let the facts get in the way of a good story," and that, "proof shows a lack of imagination." It is probably more likely that the many years as midwife and never using gloves was involved in her infection. The progression of the disease was quite mysterious in that it did not follow the usual profile expected from her blood tests. Her liver was way too healthy to even be considered for a transplant even though it was clear that she was extremely ill and in the last stages actually dying. But then Jeannine was not one for following the usual profiles! Personally, I feel that she helped prepare me for the final transition by helping me to become a fledgling midwife or midhusband, assisted me in getting some distance by divorcing me (She even had a "Conscious Divorce" party, but didn't invite me, ha!) and then let me back in very fully to be the primary care person at her home death. Although she had several opportunities to learn more about her condition by undergoing testing in the hospital, she was very clear at the end that she did not want to take the chance of dying in the hospital. Viewed from the overall perspective of her life as a dedicated teacher of expert-free rites of passage, this seems very appropriate, although frustrating at times for some of her caregivers. Jeannine is missed greatly by many. For me, we could talk using the language of astrology, yoga, Buddhism, shamanism, midwifery, archetypal psychology, Tantra and pre-found humor, developed over 25 years into a grammar of signs and phrases that conveyed years and paragraphs. Near the end, but while she still had a good deal of clarity, we surfed this Sea of Logos again together to our great pleasure. It was not always easy being with such a dedicated teacher, we would have our "dharma battles" as we called them, but I consider it a huge blessing to have been escorted over so many thresholds by this wonder-full woman, not the least of which involved the rigorous final exam of her grand exit. Today, as the moon is waxing towards its fullness in Jeannine's beloved sign of the Twins, it is the 13th day after her last breath and folks around the world will be giving thanks and holding the image of her joyous passage. In the yoga/Hindu tradition this 13th day is a time of ceremony for the Soul. Baba Hari Dass, her yoga teacher, who is perhaps not by mere co-incidence in seclusion, has said that it is good that the Moon has been waxing so that its light can now help propel her Soul free of the earth plane.
 In closing, I would like to say that the non-profit educational and charitable foundation that we created together, The Six Directions Foundation, will now be dedicated to continuing Jeannine's work and favorite projects, and in supporting her children as appropriate. There are several fundraising projects proposed, a biography begun, and a documentary film underway. If you or anyone you know has photos, videos, tape recordings, stories, etc., of Jeannine and would be willing to share them, please let me know. Thank You! Oh, one more image/idea. Re-mind everyone you know, especially pregnant and pre-pregnant folks, that Jeannine might be reincarnating, so lets treat all the babies with this possibility and give them the very best treatment, you-all know, the kind that Jeannine would want and deserve. She has been preparing the way --picking up as many stones in the path as she could in her amazing life. For All Our Relations . . .
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